So I have been seriously avoiding my blog… and everyone else’s blog…and pretty much my computer in general.

I have never felt so nauseous, light headed, hungry, full, dizzy, depressed, moody, and like I am compelled to sob uncontrollably for hours… ALL AT ONCE.

I am miserable.  I am miserable to be around.  Say a prayer for my husband and children.  They are earning big points for their continued love and support.

So, I am avoiding all contact with others because I am horrified at how I am reacting to things.  About how emotional I am.  I am avoiding leaving comments in others journals because I feel that I would not be giving them the credit they are due. 

For example, you post a picture about your sick bird, and instead of me commenting with the appropriate amount concern and compassion… I would say something like, "Tweety doesn’t know sick.  You send Tweety to my house and I will show him sick."  That is just not right. 

So why the explanation?  At 9:46 this evening, I felt a moment of peace.  My stomach wasn’t turning and my head wasn’t spinning and my eyes weren’t leaking and I was able to look at my computer screen without seeing double. 

Please know, if I don’t visit you, its because I love you.  Seriously.  I am trying to spare you the wrath of uncontrollable pregnant lady.

Someday, when this trial has passed and I can look back and laugh… you’ll thank me.

One bit of good news… I went to see Doctor today.  She was nice. 

I GOT TO SEE BABY!  I had an ultrasound and got to take home a picture of baby!!!  I cried of course.  But for once, it was happy tears.

Blessings to you and yours!


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Meet Amanda Rettke

Amanda Rettke is the creator of I Am Baker, and the bestselling author of Surprise Inside Cakes: Amazing Cakes for Every Occasion – With a Little Something Extra Inside.Over the course of her 15+ year blogging adventure, she has been featured in and collaborated with the Food Network, New York Times, LA Times, Country Living Magazine, People Magazine, Epicurious, Brides, Romantic Homes, life:beautiful, Publishers Weekly, The Daily Mail, Star Tribune, The Globe and Mail, DailyCandy, YumSugar, The Knot, The Kitchn, and Parade, to name a few.

Reader Comments

  1. poor you Amanda!! I can only hope with each passing day of this pregnancy you will start to feel a bit better!
    so glad you got to see the baby!!!
    just take care of yourself and your family; journals can always wait and will always be here
    I’m going to be moving next week and will be without a computer for probably a week, around 5/8 to 5/15 so if you don’t see a comment from me, you didn’t “chase” me away, its just I’ll be having internet withdrawals, LOL

  2. I will pray for this that, DH with be able to love you as Christ loved the church.And #1 &#2 will be blessings to their dear Mommy as she goes through this pregnancy. Remember this is only a season, it will pass. Pray before you speak, ask the Holy Spirit to direct your speach in a way that is pleasing to God. HE knows you, HE created you and He’s going through these changes WITH you! I’m so happy you’ve gotten to see #3. It is ever so exciting each time!! Peace be with you and your household!

  3. Amanda,
    I so TOTALLY understand! 🙂 You will get over it and through it. I think the LONG, LONG winter and this last snowstorm has made it worse! I need to be out in the sun and walking and playing outside! Looks like it should be nice tomorrow and Thursday so hopefully I can do all those things! 🙂
    Have a great day! And Remember “This too, shall pass!” 🙂

  4. Awww….seeing the baby for the first time is one of the nicest things in life!
    I hope you feel better sound miserable. I can only imagine how difficult it is to watch two active boys when you feel so bad. Hang in there!!

  5. You are growing a baby. That is HARD work. You also have two littles needing all the rest of you. There is no need to explain anything. You have a tough job right now that only you can do and everyone will understand.
    I seem to think everything you say is funny. Even if you aren’t trying to be funny, it’s funny. I’m sure whatever you have to say to me I will enjoy.
    please be there on Thurs….please…puh-leeez. I’ll miss ya otherwise. 🙂

  6. Oh Amanda, I am sorry that you feel so BLUE. The Lord has big plans for you. Unfortunatly that requires you to feel a bit unstable for the time being. Hang in there you truly are a blessing. I’m sure everyone will understand that you are just not up to your journal. Take it slow and this to will pass. You are in my prayers and thoughts daily. I send you my love..
    Tammy 🙂

  7. I was unable to attend Bible study this morning. Anna does, in fact, have a stuffy head cold. I wasn’t able to call anyone to let them know as it was a last minute decsion. I’m sorry if I messed up any calls you would have made, knowing that you thought I could relay your message. I’m sorry Amanda. I’m still praying for you and hoping we can both make it next week. Hang in there, hon.

  8. I hope you feel better soon, Amanda! Just remember that all of these icky, moody feelings are signs that things are going just as they should be!! Thinking of you lots these days.
    Love you! Molly

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