I Am Baker

zucchini banana oat bread (and a craptastic day)

Let me just tell you about my day.

It all started about 5:00am when I heard my baby crying and got up to feed her.  I walked to her room in a zombie like stupor, hushing her whimpers and gently picking her up and then nursed her back to sleep. Just as I got done feeding her return her my alarm went off.  Why would I set the alarm for so early?  Because I wanted to get up and work out before my husband went to work and while I could do it without kids trying to jump all over me.  I am gonna ROCK this day!

Zucchini Oatmeal Banana Bread

Right after I got my running shoes on I heard Olivia again.  She had not gone back to sleep and was now up for the day.  As I sat and rocked her and watched the sky turn from dark grey to light grey, the dream (nightmare) from last night started to come back to me.  It was not good.  I was shaking and upset and an emotional mess. (Yes, I know it was a dream, but it almost seemed like a bad memory!  I heard that the brain cannot distinguish the difference between a dream and reality so it FELT REAL)

Husband gets up and leaves for work and it occurs to me… its FREEZING in here.  Turns out that the furnace broke and we had no heat.  In Minnesota.  It was 28 degrees last night.  So I decide to bake some bread for breakfast in the hopes that the hot oven would help warm up the house.  And me.

Around 7:00am and I start making this bread.  (It tastes amazing, and I give big props to Diethood for her original recipe.  Hers is a bundt cake with some glorious maple cream cheese frosting, totally worth checking out!)  As it bakes the kids slowly rise and make their way to the kitchen.  Eddie is immediately grumpy because he didnt get cereal in a blue bowl as he demands EVERY SINGLE MORNING but the delicious warm bread eventually quiets him.

We start homeschooling and immediately the kids are whining.  Complaining.  Fighting me every. step. of. the. way.  I am freezing and keep trying to get the kids to put more layers on, but they dont seem to be phased by the chill.  I offer up hot cocoa for snack time and the marshmallows are hard as a rock and somewhat stale.  I add them anyway hoping no one notices.  No one does because they spend the whole time complaining that it’s too hot.

Olivia is awake and just fusses.  And fusses.  And fusses.  (totally not her norm.  I am completely throw off by this new behavior of hers, as she is normally so happy and content and loves to nap!)  Colton refuses to do his math and sits and the table and literally sobs at how much he doenst want to work today.  I am rockin back and forth in the corner in the fetal position.  Guess I did end up ROCKIN today.

Its about 11 and someone is coming over to fix the furnace.  He calls and says he will be there in 30 minutes so I quick try to feed Olivia.  I nurse her  and she actually starts to nod off (praise Jesus!) which is Eddie’s cue to storm into my room and scream “Mommy, where are you?!?!” as he looks me in the eye.  Olivia is awake.

I get word from a company (that I really wanted to impress) that a recipe I submitted has got a WRETCHED error in it and that someone complained.  I reply back to my contact with deepest of sincerest apologies and they are not impressed.  The twitch in my eye intensifies.

I have big project in November that requires extensive research and preparation and involves large expensive video devices to be pointed at me filming my every move.  (inner voice is a constant downer lately and I am convinced that my ex boyfriend from high school that I usually never think about and dont even know where he lives will see it and laugh laugh laugh at HOW FAT I AM and I am mortified)  I am given the wardrobe requirements for the shoot and they say, “No red, white or black.”  No black?  SURELY YOU JEST!  You might as well tell me I can only wear an itsy bitsy bikini.

Zucchini Oatmeal Banana Bread

Try to quick feed Olivia again and realize the guy-who-shall-restore-heat is here.  She is awake and fussy.  I am twitching.  Guy-who-has-restored-heat determines that its just a faulty control panel and gets heat roaring.  Hurray!  Guy-who-restored-heat tells me that in spite of how my children behave he still wants to have kids someday.

I try to prepare for dinner and  defrost some beef in the microwave.  It dies.  My microwave is dead.  My brand new state of the art microwave is dead.  I wish I could crawl into it.  Olivia is still awake.

Get email that I have an assignment due tomorrow that I forgot about.

I can hear kids screaming at each other and banging doors and walls.  They are playing “store” and selling each other stuff that they already own and it sounds like Colton just shorted Audrey some of her change.  I think she threatened to cut him.  I blame Spongebob.

zucchini banana oat bread

Ingredients

  • 1 1/2 cups flour
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 teaspoons ground cinnamon
  • 1 cup oats
  • 1 cup sugar
  • 2 eggs
  • 1 cup canola oil
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla
  • 2 ripe bananas mashed
  • 3 cups shredded zucchini

Instructions

  1. Heat oven to 350 and prepare loaf pans. (I used three small loaf pans)
  2. In large bowl add flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and oats. Stir together.
  3. In a smaller bowl combine sugar, eggs, oil, vanilla and mashed banana. Pour sugar mixture into flour mixture and stir by hand. Add in zucchini and mix until well incorporated.
  4. Bake for 35-45 minutes or until bread pulls away from sides of pan and an inserted toothpick is removed clean.
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See that there is yet another BIG FABULOUS ALL EXPENSE PAID WITH UNREAL SWAG BLOGGER EVENT that I was not invited too.  Its ok, its cool.  These things happen right?  I am sure they know that I have a baby and that I homeschool and were just being considerate of my circumstances.  That, or EVERYONE JUST HATES ME AND OBVIOUSLY I NEED TO QUIT BLOGGING FOREVER AND EAT MASSIVE AMOUNTS OF COOKIE DOUGH RAW EVEN THOUGH THAT IS NOT RECOMMENDED.

Text husband that he has to bring home dinner.  He gets home and gets it ready and the family eats.  I cant eat anymore because apparently I ate an entire pan of this bread today.  So I go walk/run sporadically while Biggest Loser is on trying to see what workout they are doing and copy them.   This is effective as they literally show one move for 4 seconds then move on which is about how long I wanted to work out anyway.

Can hear Olivia screaming.  Its time.  She needs to sleep now or I think I may develop a permanent twitch in my eye.

She is out within seconds.  Exhausted.  Now peaceful.  Her little body relaxes and she cuddles closer to me.  I am jealous of a baby.

Moral of story.  On craptastic days make sure you make yummy cake-like bread that has a vegetable in it so you can pretend you actually ate healthy and that there isn’t dishes piled sky high and laundry mounds in corners of every room.

The end.

Zucchini Oatmeal Banana Breadp.s.  I hope this post made you giggle at least once.

Photography inspired by the amazingly talented Laura at Fork Knife Swoon.

Comments

  1. Stephanie dove says

    Amanda, I just want to say when I am having a day like you just described because I too homeschool and try to stay involved with mi kids throughout the day and take them to art classes,YMCA science center they volunteer at,nursing home etc.. I actually like to turn to your blog for encouragement that I feel the lord brought me here to you! I like to bake and read cookbooks and collect them but your blog really makes my day better with the visual baked goods that inspire me to a higher level and puts a smile on my kids face when they get the call who wants to try fresh baked cookies or come look at this cake I made from Amanda’s new entry I tried. So I just want to says thanks again for being so honest and uplifting oh yea one more thing the ex boyfriend thing you mentioned, first of all you have five kids and just gave birth and look amazing you really are a pretty mommy he is proboly only wishing he married someone as successful and creative as you. Keep smiling and blogging for us, oh but even more important keep on baking! God bless.

  2. Stephanie dove says

    I said I homeschooled and somehow I spelled my mi, this iPad is so sensitive but I just wanted to correct that error or I’ll be having nightmares of how dumb that was ugg!

  3. says

    Oh, sweetie, you had a day – didn’t you? I’m a grandmother and yet reading your post brought back days I could so relate too. But you survived – thank goodness the oven was working so you could make that yummy bread which I can’t wait to try. Also thanks for being human and making a mistake on something you’ve shared. We all do it. I’m a new follower and look forward to reading more of your posts. You are a very good writer.

  4. chris says

    O.K. So I made this tonight. Absolutely outrageous and so freakin easy! I love when you don’t have to use the mixer :) Thanks for having a craptastic day….not that I would wish that on anyone ;) especially you!

  5. says

    You are hilarious. Thankyou for sharing your day…gives hope to the rest of us who have craptastic days all the time….and don’t homeschool or make fresh bread (at 5am!!!).

    I came on to your site this am following a pin to your amazing cookies….an hour later still here!! So much yummy stuff.

  6. says

    Yes, I loved this post. Yes, I giggled. And yes, as a mom of 4 I totally related! I always love your recipe posts, but you are a fantastic writer! Thanks for sharing your day, no matter how craptastic. ❤️

  7. Heba Mohamed says

    It looks amazing
    I have seen alot of recipes with zucchini in it
    Will any one be able to taste it if added to the recipe

  8. Iraa says

    “Moral of story. On craptastic days make sure you make yummy cake-like bread that has a vegetable in it so you can pretend you actually ate healthy and that there isn’t dishes piled sky high and laundry mounds in corners of every room.”

    This made me giggle no end! Sounds just like my flat, odd how piles of laundry never gets done but there’s always time for a batch of cookies or flapjacks :D

  9. says

    I came across your post this morning while looking for a zucchini-banana bread my mom used to make. The recipe looks very similar to what I remember and I might have a new favorite blog :-) Your day sounded a lot like a day around here, it’s always nice knowing I’m not the only one with crazy kids.
    Hope all your days have been better since!

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